Simple and Special. I have so very much to be grateful for.
For each new morning with its light,
For rest and shelter of the night,
For health and food, for love and friends,
For everything Thy goodness sends.
~Ralph Waldo Emerson
Happy Thanksgiving.
~K
It was February 26, 2004. I called my dear friend to share the news. We’d met the day before and as she left, we hugged and I promised I’d call her as soon as I knew. She was at the top of my list, people to call as soon as we knew the sex of my baby.
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No answer. Again and again. No answer.
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Over the next few hours I called until finally a strange voice answered her phone. Answered and told me she was gone. She’d passed away that night. 30 years old. Healthy. My sweet friend. Shocking. Incomprehensible.
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She still sits in a moment in time, smiling in my wallet. My Joy. I close my eyes and hear her laugh and smile.
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Almost 6 years ago since that day. I kept in touch with her family for some time. Her mom and I wrote letters back and forth, holiday cards and notes. I think it may have helped us both.
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I often wonder how her parents move forward each day. Her mom and I no longer exchange regular letters, but we keep in touch via facebook. I opened my computer to see she’d updated her ‘status’ on Thanksgiving.
This woman, who lost her baby girl on the same day I knew I was having a baby girl somehow shares with her world…
"Life isn't about how you survived the storm, it's about how you danced in the rain."
Amazing. Keep dancing….she would be so proud. You are an inspiration.
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Thoughts for today… because most of our days are really easy to dance through.
~K
Talking to a dear friend, she commented on my blog. We talked about how my 365 days were almost over and what changes I’ve seen doing this project and how I felt about continuing or otherwise.
She then said to me, “I’ve read every day, you know.”
I thanked her and she went on to say, “I promised myself from the beginning that if you were going to take the time to write each day for 365 days then I was going to take the time to be sure I read each day for 365 days.”
I was blown away. And so appreciative. For this boost she gave to me, for this project, for having the love of writing and for having friends like this that have such faith in me and a genuine interest in what craziness comes out of my mixed up mind each day.
~K
I saw an advertisement for this beach area where this picture was taken. The quotation describing the area was,
“Fifty Shades of Blue!”
While I may be biased… I think this picture of my beautiful beach babies basking in the blue waters… could fit their advertisement just perfectly.
Bliss.
~K
My beautiful beach boy! Look at that smile! He is perfect and sweet, kind and curious, gorgeous and smart, thoughtful and genuine.
I look at this child and am always so grateful. With each of his beautiful smiles and sparkling chocolate eyes, I am forever in love.
~K
She is full of pure joy…and provides me with just as much.
May she always carry herself so happily and always retain this joy in her heart and in her spirit.
How fortunate I am to have this bundle of joy in my life. I am in awe of her light and am forever in amazement and astonishment that she is ours.
~K
Complainers. Some people just complain. They complain if the weather is too hot, they complain if the weather is too cold. They complain about friends, work, life, sports….everything. These people simply exude negativity and this becomes in essence their personality.
I’m not even sure that it’s a conscious choice but rather, perhaps, the way they have unknowingly trained themselves to operate.
I am not exempt from this but want to consciously try to untrain myself of any of this. To remember that for the most part, our lives are so positive and filled with so much to be grateful for. To know that my happiness each day is a choice and generally one that I have a great deal of control over. I want to surround myself with others who share this view, to practice ways of living which encourage these beliefs and to monitor my personal outlook so that it doesn’t in turn affect my character.
~K
"Dwell not on the past. Use it to illustrate a point, then leave it behind. Nothing really matters except what you do now in this instant of time. From this moment onwards you can be an entirely different person, filled with love and understanding, ready with an outstretched hand, uplifted and positive in every thought and deed.
"Eile...en Caddy
1917-2006, Spiritual Teacher and Author
Someone I know posted the above quote on facebook. The interesting thing is that this person, specifically, who is using this quote to guide her life today has been recently permanently disabled in an completely random and unexpected accident which left her permanently and suddenly blind. She has a four year old daughter whom she can no longer see.
With this in mind, I focus on this quote today not only because of it’s ability to uplift and to be positive, which it certainly does, but rather, to focus on perspective… we’re all dealt hands we didn’t expect. The perspective we take , this goes to show, is what moves us forward or keeps us stagnant.
Thoughts for today.
~K
An interesting thought. Driving today, my daughter, who is six, expressed interest in the art museum. We agreed from the front seat that this was a great idea and was something we should experience ‘one of these days’.
“You guys say that always, ‘one of these days’. But why not today? Today is a day and we have time now…why not now?”
Well, there were a few reasons why, which were legitimate and we also try not to have our children determine our days or schedules completely, so don’t misunderstand. Her point, however, was interesting to me. How many things do we say we’ll do ‘one of these days’? Every now and then maybe we should consider today and now, to be the absolute perfect time.
~K
Today was gorgeous. I could not soak enough of it up. We stayed outside forever. Picnics. Bike rides. Walks along rivers.
I was intent on fully soaking up the beautiful smells the warm fall day, the fresh air blowing through the pines and filtering into the open windows of my home. I spent the day determined to fully absorb the remaining wonderful hours of a weekend that was passing way too fast.
~K
Fantastic. Football. Friends. Firewood. Food. Fall. Fun.
~K
I forgot my camera. Words will have to do.
We took what we thought was a weird chance tonight with the kids and some good friends.
We took a bizarre chance and drove into the country and went to a little backwoods bbq of sorts. We were certainly hesitant. There was minimal advertisement. Go out of town, look close for a field on the left. You’ll know you’re there when you see the handwritten cardboard sign indicating the impending festivities. It may take a few times going back and forth. It’s a small piece of cardboard.
We weren’t sure and certainly had a “Plan B”… dinner at our favorite Asian restaurant. Candlelit tables and yummy fresh veggies sautéed just right. Sushi rolls and curry pot stickers waiting for us on the other side of town.
I started to wonder as we drove into the cold night searching for our cardboard sign, tired and weary kids in the back, what we were thinking and then my mind wandered to if the wait at our restaurant would be long by the time we turned around and made it back downtown.
And then we got there. And it wasn’t too cold after all. We ate- there were 8 of us and our total was $20.00! Delicious, homemade, country food, different choices at each spot in the lot. We sampled food in the grass while the kids ran around laughing. There was a band playing country music and classic rock under a tent. Our kids took up the entire dance floor, which was grass of course… and the band took notice and switched it up to The Monkees, “I’m a Believer”… not because of the Monkees but because of our kids dancing in the grass in front. “I’m a Believer” is also the Shrek theme song and the kids went wild! Song after song, they’d hand us their bbq and then they breakdanced their little baby booties off under the moonlight while we smiled and watched and sometimes joined in.
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I forgot my camera. I wasn’t anticipating such fun. I was probably too busy thinking about my pot stickers and Plan B.
But while I was thinking and prepping so much for plan B, Plan A turned out to be the best weird chance we’d taken in a while.
I am so grateful for our friends, who love to take these odd chances with us and for family who is willing to just check things out and make fun in bizarre moments. Who’d have thought breakdancing in the moonlight at a bbq festival would have been such fun on a Friday n ight? We all left with full tummies, happy hearts and beautiful memories.
~K
I waited on today’s post, trying to figure out the right words to say. I thought and thought, went back and forth and at the end of the day am going to suffice with a very simple and heartfelt appreciation for all veterans, but with special love to my two grandfathers who are my two special veterans.
Thank you for your commitment, your sacrifice, your bravery and your love. I so very much appreciate you.
~K
I saw this the other day and laughed out loud. I knew it had a spot here. She should be writing this blog! Enjoy “Jessica’s Daily Affirmation.” If it doesn’t become one of the high points of your day I’d be surprised.
~K
Little hands making turkey feathers…. all make for a happy mama today.
~K
My son is sick. He is just little. But he’s going
to be just fine.
That’s the bottom line here today and what I am the most genuinely grateful for. It is all that matters at the end of a day.
He’s had a cold for a couple of weeks. It seemed to be lingering. We have insurance and it’s a minimal co-pay and so on Friday I took him to the doctor, just to be on the safe side. Probably overreacting, I thought.
‘I think it’s just a cold’…. the pediatrician told me. She then proceeded to hand me a paper prescription, ‘just in case it looks like it’s turning into a sinus infection over the weekend. But I really think he’s going to be just fine.’
I left, with a peace of mind, feeling just a tad bit silly at overreacting. I hastily folded the paper script, threw it into the bottom of my purse and went on with my weekend.
The weekend came and went. It seemed she was right and his cold was getting better. His nose wasn’t runny at all anymore! No fever, chills, vomiting…. all very good signs by anyone’s checklist. Lots of coughing though. Lots and lots of coughing. I dug out the paper prescription, filled it and started it just in case. Something still didn’t feel right. I call the on call nurse, available to me 24 hours a day through my pediatrician’s office.
“Coughing is good,” she sweetly tells me over the phone. “Please remember to wash your children’s hands and use lysol around the home. He’ll be fine… it’s just the end of the cold, I believe.”
The nagging in my gut persisted. Today I took him back in, and for a minimal co-pay it was worth me again, surely overreacting, but thankfully, getting one more go to look with the doc.
We waited patiently. She listened to my baby’s chest. I could see a look of, while not panic, certainly concern come over her face.
“Walking pneumonia.” she said matter of factly. “There’s a serious infection in his lungs. He’s going to be just fine and you’ve seen the worst of it. It’s a really good thing you started him on the antibiotic 2 days ago. This is really what has made the difference.”
A good mom, right? I knew something was wrong and now my baby will be safe. Ta-da!
I went to bed comfortable in this thought and the most grateful for the bottom line- my baby could have been far more seriously ill at this point and rather, he will be just fine now.
It’s hardly a ‘good mom’ though. Lots of people would be okay thinking this and taking the credit. But this is where I believe they are so genuinely wrong. The truth of it is that I am a good mom with an exceptional support system.
I wondered as I tossed and turned in the bed… those two ‘overreacting’ doctor visits, which cost me a grand total of $30.00 in co-pays,…. I wonder if I would have had to pay out of pocket what these would have cost, if I would have been as proactive or if I’d have either chosen or forced to choose to take a ‘wait and see’ approach.
A wait and see approach would have my boy in a hospital bed tonight and rather, he’s tucked in sweetly sleeping… healing… dreaming… in his footed car pajamas.
I wonder what ‘choice’ I would have made. My heart knows the answer and it terrifies me.
While I am so beyond grateful tonight that my baby is safe, my heart breaks for the other ‘good moms’ who can’t afford to overreact when their gut instinct tells them that perhaps they should.
We need to think about health care. It shouldn’t be about this. We should all have the ability to take care of all of our babies…. not just the ones in car pajamas whose ‘good moms’ have good insurance.
Food for thought- for today….
~K
“All of our dreams can come true….if we have the courage to pursue them.”
~Walt Disney
Sweet child, may you always dream big. May you always feel confident, brave, self assured and strong, my little one. And may I always have the knowledge, strength and ability to do my job to help you get there.
~K
I took my little girl a
Thirty little piggies.
Three smiling faces.
Three little girls feeling so very special on a Saturday morning.
Flowers on their toes. Pinks and purple polishes.
Perfect Little Piggies.
~K
And so my crabbiness continued as the gray outside wore on. I wasn’t feeling much positivity and without the help of some warm air and the sunshine, everything seemed to be going in the wrong direction and I needed to shake it.
Then there were three people… in no particular order and none of which I know well, certainly nowhere near well enough for any of them to know my gray day funk. Each of them at separate moments in the day said the kindest words… each about something different, but each to me.
And wouldn’t you know? It makes the largest difference.
I will try this today- it’s amazing the power of a positive word. And to think it costs nothing and requires such minimal effort.
Thank you to these three people, who without knowing it, brightened someone else’s day with their goodness.
~K
It’s a cold and rainy day today. Winter is approaching and quicker than I’d like. I’m a hot weather kind of girl. This cold gray yuck does nothing for my mood and really gets to me… not in a good way.
Today though I found a fix. My little guy and I braved the elements and went to the store for all the ingredients we needed to make vegetable beef stew. Homemade.
We came home and he pulled up a stool. We talked while I chopped and he ate fresh vegetables. We browned the meat and deglazed the pan. We added and poured, tasted and stirred and then we sat back and waited, simply enjoying the comforting aroma that began to sear pleasantly through our home.
The rainbow of vegetables simmering on the stove, a reminder of dinner waiting for us, of the promise of an evening where the four of us could reunite at our kitchen table to laugh and to talk about our days over this deliciousness- certainly proved to be a wonderful high point of an otherwise gray day.
~K
A few weeks ago, my daughter, who is six, for the first time noticed that two women friends of ours were a couple. We’ve been friends with these ladies for some time, but I guess she saw things differently now because she found it odd. She told them so. To their face. With me standing there. While this was certainly an uncomfortable moment, my friend and I laughed it off with no hard feelings, yet I found myself sad as she walked away.
What saddened me is this was the point I knew was coming. I knew that eventually society would spill over… the ‘norms’, the stereotypes, the ‘oddities’.
Well, no time like the present, right? We sat down, my little girl and I and we had a talk. It’s a talk I hope she and her brother both engrain into her soul and what I will share today. It will become your character, this lesson, I told her.
Judge people based only upon WHO they are, for what KIND of person they are, for what kind of FRIEND they are, NEIGHBOR they are and based only upon their CHARACTER.
Easy enough, really and the rest simply doesn’t matter.
If my children learn nothing else after living in this home with us, I do hope this is a lesson that they carry with them forever.
It would make me proud.
~K
I love days off school.
Cuddles in bed until we are ready to stop. Running in the yard with no worries about bedtime or packed lunches. No one to answer to. Nowhere to be.
Just my babies and me.
Nothing makes me more relaxed or content. I absolutely love it.
~K
For Fall. Halloween. Pumpkins. Tricks. Treats. For all of the goodness and giggles that went along with this wonderful weekend.
Too easy…. and isn’t that wonderful?
~K
