February 10, 2010 – Give a Little Love

“When you’ve done all you can do and when all else fails, … give love a try.”  ~K

The day is coming to an end as I sit in the quiet house and type.  It was a surprisingly wonderful day compared to the upsets of yesterday.  Why the difference?  I don’t know… the moon, the moods, the scheduling, the activities?  I’d like to think the conscious effort towards not only positivity but also and perhaps more importantly, the conscious refusal to get upset plays a huge part.  Either way, it has been a beautiful day all in all…. until bedtime.

My two year old has been out of bed multiple times.  He’s crying, having a hard time staying in his bed.   This has been going on for about 30 minutes and we’ve tried it all.  My husband has left and it’s just the little man and I.  And while I adore the little man, he and I have spent many, many hours together today.  I love this child with all my heart but would love even more to have him  sleeping at the end of the day.  

This last time I found him in the hallway, looking all pathetic in his sagging diaper and pjs, red eyes, crying for me, I tried a different approach.  I picked him up, held him and began to rub his back in the darkness of his room.  I didn’t remind him that he would lose this or that if he got up again, there was no talk of time out or spankings,… I just held him and rubbed his back.   It wasn’t long before he mumbled in his baby voice, ‘this’  and then pointed to his back.  I heard him, rolled my own eyes a bit at his demanding an extended back rub and continued.  Again, he pointed to his back and said ‘this’ but this time it was followed by ‘outz mama’.  

His back hurt.  He was pointing to his back and saying ‘ouch, mama’.   I looked further to find his skin was terribly dry.  I laid his little body down and proceeded to talk softly to him as I lathered him in the most gentle, greasy lotion I could find.  I then laid him on his tummy and moved myself next to him, stroking his fine baby hair until he fell asleep.

When all else fails, and it seemed to have failed… just a little love was the crystal clear answer.   I wonder how applicable this approach can be to many other facets of our lives…. so simple, yet so often overlooked.

~K